I hate to sound only negative and keep focusing on all the C-rap that keeps happening around here, but it just feels like that's all that is happening. I say feels because I know that isn't reality, it just seems that way. So this post is to document (mostly for me) all of the good things in our lives right now. I need to see it in print. I also believe that family blogs should be genuine, and that means putting my real feelings down and not just the "fluffy stuff". Nothing can make me feel worse than looking at all these cute blogs and feeling inadequate about my own life. I wish we could all just be more honest with each other. Oh well, that's a post for another day.
Mara started Kindergarten. Shut.the.front.door. When/How did she get soo big? I was so excited for her (and not gonna lie, for myself as well). We start walking up to the school and suddenly I feel these sobs starting in my belly. I was able to contain myself and not shed a single tear...for a moment. When I saw Mara standing there all by herself she just looked so uncertain and and scared out of her little mind, I lost it. The tears started pouring. I'm not even talking a tear or two, I'm talking borderline hysteria. She just looked so scared. So cute, but so nervous. All the other kids were chatting it up with each other and Mara seemed all alone. I think my sobs were because of the guilt I felt moving her away from all her friends and planting her there all alone. Despite my sad departure she was full of fun stories when we picked her up for the day. Each day she gets a little better telling me about her day and the friends she plays with, and each day I feel a little less guilt about moving her away from her friends.
Logan started Preschool. That day couldn't have come soon enough. As much as I adore that little man, we both needed a small break from each other. Twice a week he goes to Ms. Brooke's preschool that is in our neighborhood. He came home from the first day with the cutest drawing of a truck, and didn't surprise me at all by the detail. He did however surprise me by attempting to write his name. He did a perfect L and o then a funky g and some scribbles. This kid is a genius. I know we all think those things of our own children, but it's true! I sadly cannot take any credit for it. He honestly figures everything out by himself. He looks at something and then replicates it. It is adorable. It's so fun to watch him become a little kid. His listening skills improve every day (for which I am deeply grateful).
Both kids are in soccer. Mara is timid and careful when she plays. Logan doesn't know what planet he's on. Both ways to play are equally adorable and frustrating! Isn't that the funny thing about parenting? I don't care if they are soccer stars, but then we get there and I find myself wanting to be the screaming parent telling Mara what to do (don't worry I don't, but I'd love to). Watching Logan is another thing entirely. He is the weird kid that doesn't pay attention at all, randomly sits down, runs and bops his head up and down...you know the type? It's hilarious and slightly embarrassing. Don't call the mommy police on me for saying that. Just keepin' it real.
Sean started a new job. It kind of sucks. The positives: working M-F 9-5. That's where the positives end for me. I hate the pay and I hate the benefits (or lack there of). I guess we'll just keep waiting and see what happens.
As for me, my business has taken off running. I feel so excited every time I see a sell. I get between 30-40 each month the past couple of months. Soooo cool! Right now I'm trying to expand into the digital scrapbooking elements. It takes a bit of computer time, but I think it's worth it. Piano lessons have started again too and that helps us out a lot. The combination of the 2 "jobs" make me feel like I'm actually worth my weight to this family sometimes. I always feel like Sean works sooo hard especially compared to me. As the kids get older and my parenting job gets easier I feel guiltier and guiltier about not contributing to our family financially. These "jobs" lessen that guilt.
I feel like that's about it for us right now.
